She told me her deepest and darkest secrets, and I did the same. She told me about getting raped, how it had happened to her multiple times. It made my stomach twist and it made me felt sick. I’d hold her when she’d cry. She’d talk about missing home, across on the other side of the planet … I made her feel better. But then I moved. I left her. Right now as I’m typing this I had to take a moment to pause and think over what I have done, it just hits me so hard. Those few months feel like they were the epitomy of my life now. I miss you…”
Since launching in 2003, the site has gained some fame and has received hundreds of thousands of confessions, and millions of hits. A book called “Stoned, Naked, and Looking in my Neighbour’s Window: The Best Confessions from Grouphug.us” contains some of the most hilarious, crude, disturbing, and explicit confessions one might ever read. Some of them are heartfelt and sad explanations of people’s lives. Others are silly and harmless.
I stumbled upon a Youtube video today titled “How to kill your wife.” The video by a semi-popular video blogger TheAmazingAtheist made light of some of the dumber plans people have used to rid themselves of their spouse and make some fast cash at the same time.
A marvelous thought struck me. What other videos could one find on the topic? Perhaps there might be a pattern. And indeed there was!
How to kill your wife by ignoring her:
How to “properly” beat one’s wife. Never do it front of the children! Avoid striking her face or sensitive areas. Oh, don’t break any bones or cause bleeding either. But otherwise, yeah, and Allah might not forgive you. But he might. You know, its really up to him:
How to kill your wife by cooking ramen:
Top five ways to kill your wife according to children! (Actually, somewhat humourous, not in content but in execution):
Even McDonalds endorses killing your wife. Shocking!
It seems there is a great deal of male angst being directed against the wives of our world. We know killing is wrong but the fantasy to do away with those pesky wives is certainly there. This is an indirect mode of confession. But our most revealing confessions are often the ones we don’t intend to make, or aren’t even aware we’re making.
Its like nonverbal language. Those little twitches and hand-to-face gestures that give us away and let everyone who’s watching closely know that we’re lying. But men aren’t really kidding anyone.
Statistics Canada found that 653,000 women were abused physically or sexually by their spousal partner at least once in five years in 2004, down from 690,000 in 1999. This represents a 5 per cent decrease from the 1993 abuse rate. Its an encouraging trend. One that will hopefully continue.
The Statistics Canada report congratulates increased public awareness, support for abused women, treatment for violent men, training for police officers, and domestic violence legislation.
But if Canadian men are actually serious about putting an end to abusing their wives then we’ll have to put an end to the abuse fantasy that Youtube has shown exists as a humorous joke to many a man, child, and corporate burger maker. Not to mention the institutional acceptance of violence against women inherent within the value systems of some religions.
Statistics Canada. Measuring Violence Against Women: Statistical Trends 2006. Retrieved on Jan. 27 from: http://www.statcan.gc.ca/pub/85-570-x/85-570-x2006001-eng.pdf